Do you know the secret to getting into college? Beyond grades and SAT scores? According to Cal Newport, my latest superhero, a key ingredient in the mix is to be an interesting person. An “interesting person” is someone with a deep interest in something. It doesn’t matter what the interest is, but it has to be something that ignites your enthusiasm and that you care about KEENLY.

“Have a keen interest in something” is good advice beyond getting into college. Being keenly interested in something gives meaning to your life. Have you ever spoken to someone who is really enthusiastic about something? The topic could be something you know little about, however, the person’s enthusiasm makes listening to her talk about her subject enticing. I listen to my sister discuss bridge with her husband. I have no idea what they are talking about, but they are very connected on the subject. Which brings up a second point Cal makes: you need a community. Bridge is not something you play alone… maybe you can play with the computer, but it’s not meant to be played that way. It’s meant to be played with people, which requires learning subtle moves and understanding the nuances of the game, of your partner, of the cards.

Another friend of mine has a deep interest in old coins. He has been fascinated with them since he was a child. He knows a tremendous amount about coins, goes to coin shows and conventions, trades coins and stories, and more. When I ask him about coins, he comes to life! His eyes sparkle, he’s effusive! And his energy about his subject is contagious. When my kids find old coins, they save them for my friend.

How do you develop a deep interest? It’s not something that you just suddenly have. It’s something that grows with time. Perhaps you hear a story and become interested in something or read a book and that ignites a desire to learn more. I look at my own life and realize that I have had this interest in personal development since I was in middle school. I loved reading about how to do things better. I can trace my interest through the last 45 years. If you get me talking about it, I too become animated and want to share all I know, which can be overwhelming!

What I know from this is that I’ll never be bored. I have this deep interest that sustains me.

I’m thinking about this because as I look ahead for the next few years I see drastic changes coming. My twin daughters are planning for college and my son not too far behind. The life I’ve known and been focused on for the last 18 years is going to shift. I’m moving from full time mom back to being Alicia. I’ve been mom and will always be mom, but the demands of the job will be shifting. It comes as no surprise. I don’t want to come home from dropping my kids off at college and realize that my third stage of life is beginning and I’m not ready. Part of that is to have a deep interest in something that will draw me in so I won’t be focused on the empty house. Otherwise, my darling yellow Labrador will fill the emptiness of kids gone off and I become a dog-centric person (more than I already am!).

I have to be ready for my own life.

One key factor will be my deep interests. I am excited about those and they will help carry me through the transition. They have been on a back burner, only getting a little attention for the last few years, but change is in the air.

What about you? What are your deep interests? What do you get excited about? What types of things do you participate in with a community? The community is so important to support you! As a water aerobics instructor at the YMCA (as you know) one element of the program that I love is how the ladies watch out for each other. When someone doesn’t come to class, they notice. If she doesn’t come twice, they call and check up on her. They watch out for each other.

The time is now to take stock of your life. What are your re-occurring themes? Where do you want to focus your attention? It’s good to have a plan in place so that when in transition, you have a scaffold to support you.

If you’re feeling rudderless, and aren’t sure of your direction, then my Find Your Brilliance Program is perfect for you. The program is a deep dive into you so different aspects of you that you may have noticed, surface and provide material for you to consider for your deep interest.

If you already know your deep interest, then dig in with glee! Enjoy the time you spend with what you love! Be sure an integral part is connecting with other like-minded people to build a community.

As a culture, so much time and energy is spent planning for college. That is great for the person at that stage of life. But how much energy is spent on the other segment who says good bye at the dorm and goes home to the quiet house? It’s a major shift and can be very unsettling to lose who you were for so long. Take some time now for you and make your plans. Create a support team (community) to help you through the transition. Remember, you are not alone in this. Many of us are going through the same thing so call all those moms you know from preschool. You have more time for coffee coming soon! It’s time to reconnect with yourself and others.